In the not so distant past, I had encountered an individual that just seemed to trigger a response in me that caused every muscle fiber to tense up. Ever have such a thing happen to you?
And while I kept second-guessing my thoughts and emotions, I definitely knew there was something behind all this. Her mannerisms, her comments towards me, even the way she gestured hand motions ~ right down to the way she rolled her eyes at me. It all just seemed to highlight some very poignant aspects about her. And revealed a lot to me about myself.
Feelings that seemed reminiscent of nightmares I choose to forget. The dread of having to be in her presence was enough to cause me to want to run ~ but I didn’t. That was Jesus in me, giving me the strength to do all things that had to be done with her (it’s a wonder I didn’t develop TMJ).
She taunted me with words that said, “I don’t believe you!” And “why can’t you get this?!” And of course, my favorite, “you couldn’t have done that right!” I won’t relive all the harshness of her dagger-like comments. The Lord was there and saw it all ~ that was what I kept reciting to myself within my mind. I’m sure you get the picture. And perhaps you’ve experienced a similar moment.
The old me would’ve shot back with words of equal hurt and pain. And that’s the place from where I believe she was operating. Hurt and pain.
When we live with unhealed wounds, we tend to inflict some onto others in our path.
Aside from her obvious immature character, I detected in my spirit a very insecure young woman trying to prove and make herself “larger” than what she was feeling about herself. I chalked it up as having been in the presence of someone with many more years to grow and learn. One day she will look back and realize the foolishness of her ways, because the tide will turn on her and she will have a similar experience with someone treating her in like manner.
12 “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12 ESV
Jesus taught us to live with active and intentional compassion. This will often manifest as respect. We don’t merely feel empathy for others in dire straights, but we live it out in the love and compassion that the Fruits of the Spirit bear. Fruits don’t just hang on a tree to make the tree look good. Fruits feed people.
Throughout my hurricane experience with this person, I kept praying for her. Partially that she would see, but also so that GOD would protect her from the way I was feeling. Her words and behavior were challenging my spirit, and I did not want to misrepresent the Holy Spirit Who dwells in me. I wanted her last remembrance of me to be Him.
The power to go the distance with someone who was in pursuit of my last nerve and to do it gracefully could only come from GOD. And I knew that from day one. He had prepared me before I was in that situation, empowered me throughout those intense days, and gave me the sweet calm and peace to know that He was always with me.
When you are at peace in the midst of the storm, you know that Jesus is in your boat. It won’t matter how long the storm lasts, or how loud the thunder rolls, or even if you are drenched to the bone from the pouring rain. If you’ve got Jesus in the boat with you, everything else is incidental.
It’s possible you’re going through something very similar, or perhaps you can relate. What I want you to know in this season is this: the same GOD that loves you loves the person that is hurting you. The greatest thing you can do for yourself and them is to pray ~ pray for them. They really don’t know the pain that they’re inflicting upon you. Just like you had no idea the pain Jesus endured when He went to the cross for you. Pause and let that sit with you for a bit.
If the last encounter with them allows for Jesus to be seen through you, then that’s the best farewell gift you can ever give them. You can part your ways and let Jesus put the period at the end of that sentence. Let Him write the final chapter and close the book on the entire episode.
Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7 NLT
I love you to Heaven and Back, Girlfriend ~
LindaRJohnson, TitusTwo Visionary
Titus Two 