I know that feeling ~~ that awful ‘gnawing’ feeling in your soul that just makes you want to scream ~~ you wish it were all just a very bad dream and that you’ll soon awaken to a bright new day. But it’s not a dream ~~ and it won’t easily go away.
If you were to look at me today, you would think that I’m a fairly healthy individual. But the outward appearance can oftentimes be quite the opposite of what lies beneath smooth skin. You would even think that I’ve always been a confident and happy person. Deep inside this little individual are the marks of one that has lived a difficult life.
My confident exterior is the byproduct of GOD’S Divine intervention. By nature, I’m terribly insecure. It comes from issues of abandonment and rejection. Believing the lie that I was unwanted, I was always fearful that people would reject me if they got to know me. So I avoided getting to know people at a young age. I buried myself in academics and other ‘solo activities.’
That was the beginning of my ‘trial’ in life. My companions were fear and insecurity. Not the kind of companions that a young girl should have while trying to make sense of the world around her. So I made some not so good decisions.
When I finally met up with My Savior, Jesus Christ, my life received new meaning. But I still wrestled with my companions fear and insecurity ~~ they didn’t seem to go away immediately even though I had told them Jesus was now The Lover of my soul. Somehow, I was not yet living as a new creation.
2 Corinthians 5:17 This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!
I had to walk a Journey of faith ~~ several years ~~ to fully understand who I am in Christ. It has been a Journey that could not have happened all in one night, nor in one year ~~ because the Journey was the place where GOD developed my character. THIS is where I came to know Him intimately. How? The life lessons He provided for me along this Journey enabled me to receive His strength, His love, His wisdom ~~ these became the essential tools with which I would continue on in the Journey and become useful.
Girlfriend, the Journey is often filled with hard spots. Speed bumps, road blocks, even potholes! But we don’t stop and stay there; we keep going. Sometimes we weep and mourn in the hard spots; but we lean on our Savior to keep going. There are hard spots where it hurts so bad that we don’t know where to look. Let me help you here: ‘Look UP, Sister, LOOK UP!’
James 1:2-4 Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.
This is what happens along the Journey; we lean in closer to our Savior, we recognize His Voice, and we depend upon Him to get us through the hard spots.
And when it’s all said and done (before the next Journey begins), we will have a Testimony to share with the world.
You see, somewhere between the Trial and the Testimony lies the Treasure. That Treasure is your Relationship with The Lord Jesus Christ. It’s in those hardest spots in our life that we cling to Him the most. It’s during those ‘I can’t go through another day like this’ times that we truly experience Who He is and how deeply He loves us. And then with eyes wide open we see Him treasure us!
I encourage you, Sweet Girlfriend of mine, reach out to a strong Sister during this hard spot in your life ~~ pray with her ~~ let her love you with the Love of Christ, and you will be able to give Testimony of the greatness of God ~~ and you, too, will behold your Treasure.
I love you to Heaven and Back!