“When Friends are Absent”

Sweet friendships refresh the soul and awaken our hearts with joy, for good friends are like the anointing oil that yields the fragrant incense of God’s presence. Proverbs 27:9 The Passion Translation

True friends are a rare find … I get it. The older I get, I’m finding that life takes us all in different directions and sometimes that means our likes, dislikes, preferences, availability, accessibility, responsibilities … all of that … start to change the trajectory of … well, life. Can anyone relate?

Friendships that once were, are no more. And that’s not to say it’s all bad to see some of them fade into the sunset. Or that those treasured friends are no longer in your contacts. But that maybe the demands of today have taken us in through diverse tunnels and a myriad of experiences that some of those precious friends cannot relate to nor have a passion towards.

Some friendships don’t last for long, but there is one loving friend who is joined to your heart closer than any other! Proverbs 18:24 The Passion Translation

I would not be honest if I didn’t say I miss some of those old friends I used to have. Those memories of talking for hours and sharing our hearts and sharing prayers of faith and encouragement — those I miss dearly. But for whatever reason, GOD in His omnipotence has sent me on my way without the company of those who were once there with me. I have grieved. I have re-examined my heart — to check for sin on my part. But with a clear conscience I lift my head to cast my eyes upon the One Who points me in the direction I must continue walking. He walks that path with me and keeps me on the journey set before me.

Have life’s circumstances altered the look of your friendships? Take heart, Girlfriend …

“Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends. Revelation 3:20 NLT

I can tell you that many years ago when I was still trying to understand this life of the Christ-follower, I had to let go of those friendships that would only drag me down into that old familiar pit that Jesus had died to free me from drowning in. Was it hard? Of course it was. Did it happen over night? Absolutely not. Was it worth it? Every bit of it and more.

And then there was the issue of trust. Do I trust the former friends to not make me their topic over dessert and coffee, now that I no longer could witness their behavior? Can I trust new friends to handle the not-so-pretty-details of my past life and still want to be around me? Is the trustworthiness of GOD enough to cover it all?

The friendship I have with Jesus surpasses all that the human imagination can possibly fathom. And while this season continues to unfold and take shape, I am reminded of the sweetness of the fact that friendship with the world — anything other than my Savior — is choosing it over Him. I’m not making that mistake again. Pain has a way of teaching us lessons — if we will listen.

Yes, it feels cool to be accepted by certain groups and specific individuals with influence. And yes, it’s ego-inflating to be linked to or connected with a group as opposed to being a stand alone. But when you know in your heart of hearts that the rhythm of yours is not synced to theirs, it’s time to take a personal inventory and be sure to have that connectivity with the One Who matters most.

Mature friends that transform into acquaintances over time understand that the priority is always GOD and what He has planned for you. No need for further explanation or bad feelings for having to decline joining the old circle. The activities that used to define those friendships are suddenly not appealing. And that’s okay.

Girlfriend, if people have let you down by not ‘being there’ for you during a difficult season, either they themselves are going through a season of their own, or the Lord’s compass for your life points the needle in a slightly different direction. You need not try to ‘make things fit’ or alter the way you live to fit their plans.

The priority is to stay on course with what GOD has designed for you to do. If you’re open to His Ways of ‘newness,’ He may bring other people into your life to enrich it and give you opportunities to serve Him in a way you had not thought possible.


I am going to do something new. It is already happening. Don’t you recognize it? I will clear a way in the desert. I will make rivers on dry land. Isaiah 43:19 GWT

Be open to the possibilities of newness and refreshing as only our Creator GOD can do it. You just might be pleasantly surprised and thankful you did.


I love you to Heaven and Back, Girlfriend ~~

LindaRJohnson, TitusTwo Visionary


    1. Hayley: I’m glad that you’re able to share this with your daughters to help soothe some of the current ‘rough spots’ in life. It wasn’t easy to write — but I believe that as you said — many of us can relate. Blessings to you, Sister.❤️


    1. Chiazo: I’m so glad we have connected here. This current season can be translated into so many different ways, but the common thread of ‘separation’ seems to be heavy on many hearts. As Believers, we have hope in Jesus Christ — and He will get us through all seasons. (((HUGS)))


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