Nothing out of the usual routine ~~ just getting ready for work and the day ahead of me ~~ then it suddenly hit me: “You’re older now, Girl …”
The grim reminders of being dust ~~ and the slow decay that inevitably becomes each one of us (notice how I pulled you in with me) with every waking moment.
As I was “transforming” my canvas (Girlfriends know what this means), I couldn’t help but let my mind wander into the vast memories of yesteryears gone by ~~ how my skin seemed so much more youthful and firmer then ~~ how the lines had not yet found a place to settle into ~~ and how taking selfies has revealed to me the need to pull up those neck muscles with every opportunity in front of the camera.
Yes, God was showing me the obvious changes I’m now physically living with. Then the soft and subtle whispers of internal and spiritual changes became more audible. In the silence and stillness I hear His beckoning.
“Have I allowed Him to transform me from the inside out?”
This launched an all out conversation with God about where I am ~~ where I’ve come from ~~ where I’m going ~~ what I want to do ~~ whom I want to reach ~~ the legacy I want to leave behind.
Psalm 143:8 Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you.
My heart says: “I want to give the love of Christ to those who don’t know what that looks like or what that feels like or what that tastes like.” This is the legacy I wish to leave behind.
Not that I seek applause or accolades from the world ~~ but to hear:
Matthew 25:21 “The master was full of praise. ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!’
This is what I seek! Girlfriend ~~ I was not always of this heartset (as opposed to mindset). This transformation has been a lifelong process initiated and foreordained by God Himself ~~ I have merely chosen to be a willing daughter. The potholes and sinkholes that I have fallen into over the course of my life are evidence of the occasional foolishness I’ve also participated in.
But I continually let God have His Way with me and the direction of my Journey with Him on this side of Paradise. And I can genuinely say I don’t fall into those holes like I used to ~~ even better, I don’t have to trust my own sense of direction ~~ I’m learning (though far from perfect) to allow God to give that all to me.
It’s relieving to know I can rest here ~~ take a pause break ~~ and examine where this Journey has come this far. And while I know it’s far from over, I don’t have to labor over “what on earth will I do?!”
It’s time to move forward now ~~ this day calls me as it calls you, Girlfriend. Along the Journey called “today,” let’s remember to keep the conversations with God active and alive ~~ even though we’ve stepped out of the shower and into the light of a new day.
I love you to Heaven and Back ~~